Day Two

My heart cries for Your Love. I know that feeling Your Divine Love will wash my sins away. I know I haven't always been truthful and honest, and I have harmed people I love. I didn't know better and did only what I could. Had I only known that there is a much greater Love than Human Love and allowed that Love to enter my Heart and Soul.

I always wanted to Love and comfort others. My first experience was in my mothers womb, where I really felt her fear and unhappiness. I immediately tried to comfort her, but she couldn't feel me. This continued after my birth, with my mother and family and with many other people.  I wasn't loving enough towards myself, and ended up in guilt, depression and self hatred. I couldn't feel myself and my emotions anymore.

Being in that place it is difficult to trust that there is a God, who actually cares. You must then learn to feel your emotions again, and to forgive yourself and others. Taking responsibility. Ask for help.

Praying or asking for Gods Divine Love to flow into me is also asking for help. Asking for help has always been difficult for me, which might explain why it has taken me quite a long time to develop my relationship with God. But then everything comes in right time.

Now there is this Desire to know God. To make friends with God. To have my own personal relationship with God.  Noone can do it for me. I have found great help and support in different teachers and teachings. Many wonderful healers have helped me release old wounds and emotions. But ultimately it is between me and God.

LOVE ALWAYS,
Connie